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No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Take a seat, fashion friends. Word on the street is, in a cruel game of fashion musical chairs, Karl Lagerfeld will not renew his contract at Chanel, Alber Elbaz will move in, and Olivier Theyskens will take over Lanvin.
I haven’t finished my morning coffee yet, so please stand by while I process this information and get in touch with my feelings surrounding the matter:
9:41am – Feelings of confusion, loneliness, and just a little bit sleepy.
9:53am – I think my coffee is broken. No change since above.
11:52am – Awake now. Slightly enraged – but that could be directed at co-workers.
12:17pm – Freaking the hell out.
1:29pm – Uncontrollable sobbing.
1:49pm – Just ate my feelings with a bag of Doritos. Feeling slightly better.
4:03pm – Finally, acceptance! If you think about it (as I have – and only have – for the past 3 hours) Karl can’t quit fashion in a Brokeback Mountain sort of way, anything Alber Elbaz touches instantly turns to jewel-toned deliciousness, and Olivier Theyskens – well, he’s got that French sensibility. So fear not my fashion friends! I’m not worried about it, you shouldn’t be.
And we can sleep well tonight. Good thing because I’m pooped.
UPDATE! It’s not true! According to The Cut, Karl will be churning out tweed jacket even in his grave. Phew.
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